Continuation from yesterday....

If there is a hard way to do something, I will find it. I'm crafty (as in knitting, sewing, gardening, baking/cooking, etc). My sister buys cookie dough, I mix it myself. I knitted my sister wristlets over the weekend, rather than try to shop for them. My parents' dishwashing machine was fixed after I moved out. My touch is all over that slowly degrading house.
Every weekend I am at there, they need me to do something. We have an agreement, I get to wash my clothes there, they get guaranteed time. It keeps Febtober from conveniently washing the same load over and over. Every time I open their door, it's not "hey, I'm here to do a fun activity or just hang out". It's "what needs to be done... what chore is not completed, what's broken, what needs to be addressed by me because no one else sees it?"  My parents and brother generally sleep in until the crack of noon.  I arrive at their place no later than nine in the morning, after showering and packing what I need to take.  I get to leave usually by ten at night, after finally getting my laundry done and we have returned from some sort of outing (that magically always occurs right before I can put my load in the dryer after doing two of theirs). Yet, that's not the problem. I actually enjoy finding some of the projects.
But the draining factor... for over twenty years, neither one of my parents has consistently done a household chore by themself or at all. All of the children are beyond the "learning phase". Because of this, any time one of them asks me to "help out"-aka do it for them, my energy level instantly drops. In reality, they don't have the luxury of being lazy. No chore is complete and the list keeps growing. But my mother is physically unable to do some things. It upsets me that she doesn't even try. I have suggested that they need to get rid of the "country home" because they obviously cannot keep up. I have been a good daughter, and helped out when they needed it (like when someone was sick/out of town/a large project was underway), but I keep waiting for them to find some sort of effective groove. My parents tell me what is important to them, and where they are lacking... but don't do jack to fix the 'problems'. In fact, it's worse.
I can't swoop in to "save" them. I have my own life, my own dreams... yet this is my family... even when my dreams are to start one of my own, how do I justify continually abandoning them? {That feeling I have, I might address later}
Is it any wonder that when I have a day off (and have lied to my family about being busy), I revert to simple things? Playing in the dirt on my balcony, making pretzels to take to work, reading, knitting, etc. I tend to shy away from short-cuts. My cell has so many roll over minutes, I could talk all month and not worry. I wonder why I have the thing, and realize it's because I don't always check my email. I live a bit far away to drop notes in my friends' doors, so I text them or blog here-same idea, newer delivery method. It also explains why I get a weird look on my face when my buds are done for the night after a couple hours. I'm quite accustomed to going full speed until I crash out. Guess they need more beauty sleep, lol.
I grew up that way, and remember many nights reading by candlelight because the light in my bedroom was too bright and would keep my dad up. I don't dream of finding a cute house, I fully anticipate having to build one. It's part of why I want to get a MArch. If I fail to get a great job (again), I can at least design a house I can hopefully build before I die.
I'm tired of doing the vacation planning, keeping the kids on task, noticing another leak in the roof... So while a friend dreams of things that remind me of my teen years, I realize that while I may agree... I want to find reasons to use my phone more often. So :P